Staying Connected

Staying Connected

It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been with your partner or what type of relationship you have, there is always room for improvement. However, it’s not always clear what steps you should take to enhance your connection, which is where we can help. At the Relationship Center of Albuquerque, Dr. Marji Prefontaine has more than 30 years of experience providing quality marriage therapy to couples in New Mexico, and she can help you and your partner stay connected as time goes by.

 

Couples therapy isn’t just for major problems, such as infidelity. Often, it is the smaller problems, including basic communication issues, that couples should focus on, and Dr. Prefontaine will act as a third set of eyes and ears to help you identify issues that you may not be paying attention to in your relationship. Therapy will also help you gain some basic tools for recovering from any problems in your relationship.

 

Whether you feel that your relationship is functional and happy or you notice that you and your partner are having some problems, couples therapy is a great way to resolve conflicts and help you and your partner stay connected through open and effective communication.

Schedule a session with Dr. Marji Prefontaine by calling 505-821-1948. For more information, visit www.DrMarji.com. 

Patterns of Conflict

Patterns of Conflict and Arguments

Patterns of conflict in relationships often emerge when couples repeatedly argue about certain topics. As a couple argues repeatedly, communication is broken down, preventing constructive conflict resolution. This leads to the development of poisonous patterns of hurtful or unproductive behavior. There are four main behaviors that couples engage in that can lead to conflict in their relationship. These behaviors are criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling.  

 

Criticism, in this case, is described as attacking your partner’s personality, rather than their behavior. While airing a complaint can be a healthy relationship activity, criticism is a personal attack that can lead to a breakdown in communication. Contempt is a behavior that often follows directly from criticism. Contempt is similar to criticism, except that contempt implies one partner’s intent to insult or psychologically abuse the other. It is usually expressed through snide or antagonistic remarks, a mocking attitude and hostile humor.

 

The third common relationship problem is defensiveness, which is what emerges when both partners feel victimized by the each other. It often becomes a reflex and prevents conflicts from being resolved. After defensiveness, there is stonewalling, which appears when relationships are in serious decline. This behavior occurs when one partner or both stop responding to each other, even to act defensively.

 

With the help of Dr. Marji Prefontaine, you can find how certain common behavioral problems are leading to a pattern of conflict in your relationship. At the Relationship Center of Albuquerque we offer couples counseling that can help you and your partner communicate more effectively and strengthen the bonds of your relationship. Call 505-821-1948 to schedule a therapy session. For more information, visit www.DrMarji.com. 

Rebuilding Trust

Rebuilding Trust                                                                   

Emotional safety is a vital aspect of any healthy relationship, but it can only be accomplished with trust. If your trust and emotional safety have been compromised, it can be difficult to rebuild, but it is not impossible. Here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we can help you and your partner heal after betrayal and restore the trust to your relationship.

 

When rebuilding trust in a relationship, it is important for partners to acknowledge the impact of the hurt that has occurred. If partners don’t understand how they’ve hurt each other, they cannot regain trust in one another. Partners must also understand why betrayal occurred in order to move on and not repeat the hurt.

 

During the trust-rebuilding process, it is also important not to do more damage to the relationship. This means not punishing your partner, which may make you feel better in the moment but does not help you heal or rebuild trust.

 

Rebuilding trust begins with open, honest and respectful communication on a regular basis. Couples must remember to keep promises and to follow through with commitments with each other. If you or your partner is experiencing emotional pain, it should be expressed without blaming.

 

These are only a few of the tools used to restore trust to a relationship. It takes time and patience, but with counseling you can rebuild your relationship. We can help at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque. Dr. Marji Prefontaine has practiced marriage and family therapy for more than three decades and is committed to helping couples like you develop a more positive relationship. 

Self Esteem & Life Transitions

Self esteem is extremely important to us as it affects how our patients live their everyday life. There are a lot of life transitions that can cause a lack of self-esteem, and a lot of ways that low self-esteem affects people in a negative way.

 

From not wanting to meet new friends to avoiding social situations, low self-esteem is damaging to a person’s self-worth. We have discovered that not getting help for self-esteem can lead to social anxiety and clinical depression in some patients.

 

That’s why we here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque help our patients find their confidence and improve their self-esteem through counseling and therapy. No matter what the situation, there are ways to improve a person’s self-esteem. In some patients, behavioral therapy to teach the person about their own worth and value is high.

 

It is our job to determine the best course of treatment, and we treat each of our patients individually and uniquely. Regardless of the cause surrounding the self-esteem and life transition issues, we encourage all patients to seek help in our therapy office.

 

Patients can schedule an appointment here in Albuquerque, NM with Dr. Marji Prefontaine. In addition, call us today for a free telephone consultation.

Social Anxiety

While it is very common for people to be nervous or shy in new social situations,social anxiety is something else entirely. It is not simply a matter of being nervous around people, but having extreme difficulty with social situations.

 

Having social anxiety can be debilitating, keeping the person who has it from forming or maintaining friendships or relationships. Many people with social anxiety avoid speaking in public, fail to take jobs because of the interview, and rarely go out in public when there will be others around. It keeps them from everyday activities, which is why we feel it is important for patient to start getting treatment as soon as possible.

 

There are many treatments for social anxiety from Dr. Marji Prefontaine can help, including:

• Speaking in public.
• Dating and romance.
• Being more assertive.
• Building self-confidence.
• Making new friends.
• Building interpersonal skills.
• Advancing at work.

We help in a variety of ways, including identifying the overall cause of the anxiety, providing one-on-one counseling sessions and behavioral therapy, and helping with individual desires, like relationships or learning interpersonal skills.

 

If you have social anxiety, visit the Relationship Center of Albuquerque in Albuquerque, NM today. For our patient’s convenience, we offer morning Saturday hours.

Compulsive Disorders

Here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we provide treatments for patients for a variety of conditions, including compulsive disorders. A compulsive disorder is an addiction to anything, whether it is sex, shopping, drugs and alcohol, smoking cigarettes, or eating. With an addiction, the sufferer feels like they need to do something and do not have control over it. It goes beyond abusing drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes, and becomes a need, rather than a desire.

We understand how damaging compulsive disorders can be not only to the individual, but others involved as well. This is why we offer counseling to help the individual and their loved ones get through the disorder without permanent damage.

Through regular visits, Dr. Marji Prefontaine provides behavioral therapy sessions, group counseling, and individual cognitive counseling to work through the cause of the compulsive disorder. This helps the individual identify where the problem started, in order to devise a proper way and treatment plan to manage it.

We recommend calling us at 505-821-1948 if you or someone you love is dealing with a compulsive disorder and is ready to get help.

Social Anxiety Disorder

Here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we treat a variety of anxiety issues, including social anxiety disorder. While many people experience some level of nervousness in social situations, people with social anxiety disorder find themselves to have a deeply-rooted problem that causes them to avoid most social functions. These individuals find that the social situations are so stressful, it becomes debilitating to them.

Having social anxiety disorder can also affect everyday situations sufferers need to be involved in, such as:

1. Eating or drinking in public.

2. Working in front of other people.

3. Using public restrooms.

4. Speaking on the phone.

5. Being the center of attention.

6. Working in an office environment.

Social anxiety disorder prevents itself through a variety of symptoms, including not being able to introduce yourself to others, constantly worrying about embarrassing yourself, and avoiding social situations just so you don’t deal with these intense emotions.

Dr. Marji Prefontaine treats social anxiety disorder, including diagnosing this disorder and helping patients with a wide range of situations. In particular, this includes helping patients in a one-on-one environment with dating, public speaking, making friends, gaining confidence at work, working on interpersonal skills, being more assertive, and being more confidence in social situations overall. If you are experiencing social anxiety in Albuquerque, NM, don't hesitate to call us directly and confidentially at 505-821-1948.

Health Anxiety or Hypochondria

Health anxiety or hypochondria is a type of anxiety that affects the way people feel about their health. They often become obsessed with their own health, assuming every symptom, sore throat, headache, ache, or pain is due to a serious illness or disease. Dr. Marji Prefontaine treats this type of anxiety through different methods, including counseling, medication, and education about what hypochondria is.

The common symptoms of health anxiety or hypochondria include:

• Believing minor symptoms can lead to a serious illness.


• Seeing doctors repeatedly for these minor symptoms.


• Having intense anxiety about having a serious disease.


• Switching doctors often because the previous one did not provide a diagnosis.


• Doing health research on an obsessive level.


• Checking vital signs frequently.


• Checking your body for sores or lumps frequently.


• Thinking you have a disease you read about.

Here at Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we treat different types of anxiety, including health anxiety or hypochondria. It is a common occurrence, even though many individuals feel there is nothing wrong with them on a psychological level. If you are experiencing any of the above symptoms, call our office at 505-821-1948 to schedule an appointment.

Couples Counseling

At Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we provide counseling and therapy for individuals, couples, and families experiencing issues in their lives. Couples counseling is one of our more common types of therapy, which helps couples of all kinds with issues in their relationship. But it isn’t just couples with problems that visit us; we also believe in couples counseling for improving the relationship and helping the bond become even stronger.

Children do not participate in couples counseling if the couple has children. Couples counseling here at Relationship Center of Albuquerque is only for improving the couple and providing them with a healthier relationship. We help our patients improve on their communication, find resolution, and give them a free space to talk about their emotions, feelings, worries, and concerns. Some couples need help with intimacy issues, while others are having struggles with their parenting styles or financial situations.

Dr. Marji Prefontaine opens up the line of communication in the couple, assessing any issues they are facing and helping them to heal. In many cases, just having a neutral third party to listen to them helps both people in the couple come to better understanding with what the other person is going through. If you’re considering couples counseling, learn more by calling us at 505-821-1948.

Family Counseling

Family counseling is one of many counseling services we offer here in Albuquerque, NM. People come to us for counseling for their family for different reasons involving their family dynamics. Even the smallest problem within the family can be devastating and cause severe emotional stress for one or multiple members of the family. By getting help with their problems, our patients prevent more serious consequences and help their family stick together through a difficult time.

Here at Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we help families with all sorts of situations. Families seek our help due to financial issues, children or teens dealing with anxiety or depression, or a family dealing with a separation or divorce and hoping to help their children deal with the change in their family dynamic. In some cases, families seek counseling from our office because their children feel they are not getting enough attention, while other adolescents want more freedom. Through counseling and family therapy, adolescents feel more free in speaking their feelings and parents get some resolution into whatever issues they see.

Divorce and blended families are two very common issues with families. We provide counseling for children and parents going through a divorce, as well as helping children adjust to their new blended families with step-parents and step-siblings. Contact Dr. Marji Prefontaine today to benefit from family counseling.

Eating Disorders

In the United States, there are approximately 24 million people of all ages dealing with eating disorders, according to the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders. People with eating disorders are among all ages, genders, social statuses and lifestyles.

Here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque, Dr. Marji Prefontaine understands the importance of offering counseling and psychotherapy for people with eating disorders. Eating disorders cause the sufferer to become preoccupied with food, physical fitness and their own weight. It is an unhealthy lifestyle that can lead to serious medical complications and can even be fatal.

Eating disorders include anorexia, bulimia and binge-eating disorder. Each of these disorders is serious and based on unrealistic expectations. Many people suffering from eating disorders have mental and emotional disorders that have led them to an unhealthy way of life. Signs of someone having an eating disorder includes extreme weight fluctuations, using the restroom after every meal, cuts on the person’s fingers and roof of their mouth, and a visible obsession with food and weight.

Eating disorders counseling is important because Dr. Prefontaine addresses the underlying cause of the eating disorder, whether it is depression, anxiety, a mental disorder or a childhood trauma. Many different aspects of a person’s life can contribute, which is why counseling and therapy is essential to helping overcome it.

If you notice signs of eating disorders in a loved one, call us at 505-821-1948 to get more information and schedule an appointment.

Individual Counseling

Individual counseling is something just about everyone can benefit from. The goal of individual counseling here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque is to help our patients identify areas of their life causing stress, anxiety, fear or conflict to help resolve those issues.

For some, it’s about learning conflict resolution with people causing them stress, while others learn to deal with depression and the strong emotions that come with it. Dr. Marji Prefontaine works with each patient individually to offer them the counseling they need.

Here are some of the situations where participating in individual counseling here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque can help:

1. Teenagers dealing with bullying in school.

2. Anyone with anxiety, extreme stress or depression.

3. Signs of self-harm, such as cutting, eating disorders or cutting.

4. Having thoughts of harming yourself or others.

5. Trouble dealing with loss and grief.

6. Persistent conflicts with friends, roommates or family members.

7. Difficulty adjusting to new changes, like college, a new move or new job.

Individual counseling helps patients come to a realization about what they want in their life, people or situations that are holding them back. It offers them a place to express their feelings without judgment or criticism, and helps them make healthy and positive changes.

To learn more about how individual counseling can help, call us directly at 505-821-1948. When you call, ask us about our free telephone consultation and 20% off discount for the first visit.

Stress Management

Everyone deals with some level of stress in their lives, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get help dealing with it. Whether it’s relationship trouble, money woes or work stress, it can cause mental and physical illness when it isn’t dealt with properly -- especially when the stress accumulates due to added pressures. Dr. Marji Prefontaine offers stress management to help patients handle the various stresses they have in their everyday life.

Stress management isn’t necessarily about avoiding the stressful situations in your life, but learning how to best manage stress to keep it at a manageable level. This includes identifying the main sources of stress and coping with it in healthy ways. Many people turn to substance abuse and other unhealthy ways of dealing with it, but we offer counseling for stress education as a positive, healthy alternative.

Here at Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we believe stress can be managed in a healthy way. In doing so, we help patients learn ways of coping with stress to keep it from affecting their lives in a negative way. To start on the path to healthy stress management, call Dr. Marji Prefontaine at 505-821-1948 to schedule your first counseling session.

Grief or Bereavement

Experiencing grief or bereavement after a loss of a loved one can cause our patients to go through a series of emotions. Here at the Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we provide our patients with an outlet to express these emotions without judgment.

Many of our patients tell us that it is often difficult to share their experiences, memories and feelings with close relatives about who they lost because they are also grieving. This is why Dr. Marji Prefontaine makes herself available for grief and bereavement.

People dealing with grief or bereavement typically go through five steps:

1. Denial


2. Anger


3. Bargaining


4. Depression


5. Acceptance

We help patients go through these important steps in a safe and caring environment that enables them to express their emotions and talk to someone who helps the process go more smoothly.

Counseling is an essential part of grieving because it allows the patient to deal with the loss and learn how to deal with these different stages of grief, from denial to acceptance. If you or someone you know is grieving over a loved one, schedule a consultation with Dr. Prefontaine in Albuquerque, NM to get help for the bereavement process by calling 505-821-1948.

Relationships and ADD

It is not always easy to maintain a healthy relationship.  This is especially true for those that are suffering from ADD.  As children, you may find it difficult to pay attention in school or to finish dull or boring tasks.  As we age, this can evolve into self-esteem issues and put a strain on relationships.  If you or your partner has ADHD, you may have difficulty:

• ·         Paying attention – It difficult to listen and communicate with your partner. 


• ·         Staying organized – As a result, you may forget a birthday or anniversary.


• ·         Finishing tasks – This can lead to lack of commitment in your relationship.


• ·         Handling responsibilities – You may forget to pay the bills, clean, etc.


• ·         Managing your emotions – It is easy to lose your temper, leading to major misunderstandings.

It is important that people with ADD seek treatment to improve their focus and deal with relationship issues.  We offer services that diagnosis and treat ADD at our practice.  Call 505-821-1948 to schedule an appointment and to take steps in improving your relationship.

Depression

Depression is more than simply feeling sad.  The loss of a loved one, loss of a job, moving to a new place, and a number of other factors can lead to this chronic health condition.  Depression can have a severe impact on your life and can even make you feel like a different person.  If you are suffering from depression, you may experience feelings of hopelessness, lack of sleep, inability to concentrate, lack of desire to socialize, and lack of interest in things you once enjoyed, among other symptoms.

If you are feeling depressed, it is important to surround yourself with things that make you feel happy.  At Relationship Center of Albuquerque, we can help you overcome feelings of depression and enjoy the things that once made you happy again.

Anger and Relationships

It is natural to feel frustrated, confused, disappointed and sad when negative things happen in a relationship.  While these emotions can take many forms, it’s important that we learn to manage and release anger in a positive way.  By finding outlets for your emotions, you can work through problems and control your anger.

Some people struggle with expressing anger through violence and self-destruction, while others hold anger inside.  We work with you to help you channel your anger in a more constructive way and work through your relationship problems.  Through anger management counseling, you can find out what triggers your emotions and learn to manage anger in the future.  If you are struggling with anger management and it is affecting your relationship, we invite you to visit us in Albuquerque, NM.  We look forward to helping you effectively manage your anger before it has a negative impact on your life and your relationship.

Anxiety

Over 25 million Americans suffer from anxiety disorders.  This common mental health issue is more than feeling nervous or anxious from time to time.  Chronic anxiety can result in panic attacks, shortness of breath, chest pain, dizziness, sweating, trembling and nausea. 

Anxiety disorders can be triggered by traumatic experiences, neglect or abuse during childhood, and other events that impact your psyche and mental state.  Fortunately, anxiety disorders do not have to be permanent.  We work one-on-one with our patients to lessen or even eliminate anxiety.  When you gain a better understanding of your anxiety, you can learn to conquer it.  Although it is not always easy to face your anxiety head on, we invite you to call us and learn more about how we can help.